What to Expect in Couples Counseling
A look at how a first couples session unfolds and what you can ask before you go.
Before a Couples Appointment
Scheduling Your First Session
Couples counseling can start with a free 15-minute phone consultation. This call is a chance to describe, in general terms, what brought you and your partner to reach out and to ask about scheduling, fees, and whether sessions happen in person or by video.
Keep follow-up email focused on scheduling, not private clinical details. You can bring personal concerns to your appointment, where each partner has time to describe what feels difficult and ask questions about how the conversation will proceed.
Two People Speaking
Both Partners Have Time to Talk
In the first session, both partners describe what is happening between them and what led them to ask for help. Your therapist asks questions to understand each person's point of view, rather than taking one account as the full picture.
There is no expectation that you and your partner agree on everything before the session starts. The point is to begin a conversation that includes both of you, not to arrive with a settled explanation.
A Plain Explanation
What EFT and Gottman Method Mean Here
Our couples service uses EFT and Gottman Method principles to frame the conversation. Put simply, EFT looks at the feelings underneath an argument, such as fear of disconnection, while the Gottman Method focuses on specific patterns of talking and listening between partners.
Your therapist explains these ideas in plain terms as they come up, rather than using them as jargon. You can ask what a term means or how it applies to a specific exchange between you and your partner.
Trying Something New
An Optional Practice Moment
If useful, you might practice a different way of speaking during a session or consider something to try between appointments. Discuss any suggested practice with your therapist, including what feels manageable when you are back at home. It is not a test of how committed you are to the relationship.
- Naming a feeling instead of a complaint
- Restating what you heard your partner say
- Pausing before responding to a comment
Clinician Options
Who You Might Meet With
A therapist on our team is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with California License #120707. Relationship issues are among the clinician’s areas of focus, and this clinician offers English and Spanish sessions. Ask about therapist availability for couples work and how EFT and Gottman Method principles might be used in your appointments.
Length and Cost
Session Length and Fee
Couples and marriage counseling appointments last 80 minutes. Contact us for current fees. The longer format gives both partners time to speak and allows your therapist time to ask questions of each of you.
Before booking, ask about payment and the 24-hour cancellation policy. Payment options include major credit cards as well as FSA and HSA cards.
Where You Meet
Office or Video Appointments
An office appointment takes place at 191 Sand Creek Road, Suite 230, Brentwood, CA 94513. Video is another option while both partners are located in California. Consider where you can speak privately and whether each person can attend without work or household interruptions.
If you and your partner would be joining a video session from separate locations, mention that during your consultation so you can talk through what might work for your schedules.
Next Steps
Ask Questions Before You Schedule
A free 15-minute phone consultation is the place to ask about format, fees, and availability before your first appointment. Call (925) 331-0457 or email info@heartnmindcounseling.com to set up that call.
Keep email limited to scheduling questions. Clinical details are better saved for a conversation with your therapist once sessions begin.
Common Questions
Do Both Partners Need To Attend The First Session?
Couples sessions are built around both partners speaking. You can ask about attendance questions specific to your situation during the free phone consultation.
How Long Is A Couples Session And What Does It Cost?
Contact us for couples and marriage counseling fees. Payment details can be discussed during your free 15-minute phone consultation.
What Does EFT And Gottman Method Mean In A Session?
EFT looks at feelings underneath an argument, and the Gottman Method focuses on patterns of talking and listening. Your therapist explains both in plain terms as they apply to your situation.
